fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
