Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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