i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
then he tried to convert me to islam
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
