But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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