your room smells of hookers.
And success
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
