Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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