mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
my being single is dangerous.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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