have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
