We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
