doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
My bed smells like the plague
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