Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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