So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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