My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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