Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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