omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize