You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
