doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Sacagawea was the original milf.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
