you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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