i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
they're like a gay fantastic four
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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