Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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