dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I think i got beer on your cat.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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