I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
