you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
