She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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