hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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