areolas are like halos for boobs.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
