Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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