Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Randomize
