I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I wish i was in the wii world.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
