nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
