I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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