with your own penis?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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