my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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