doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
