quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
