You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
porn star boner night. come get it.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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