The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
