If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
