I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
