weddingsv make me drug and hornr
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
wow bdsm is so cute
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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