forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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