If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
