Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
