Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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