She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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