why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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