bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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