Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
