she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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