So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I want to have your abortion
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize