they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize